The World’s Newest Nation

Become a Citizen HERE

 

  NEXT EVENT IN SLOWJAMASTAN: Sunday, December 8th, 2024

Nov
11

Newly Re-Elected Sultan Graces Historic Brawley Parade

    …Declares it ‘A Close Second to the Slowjamastan Royal Procession’ BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP  l  STAFF WRITER November 10th, 2024   Brawley, CA: In an event that could only be described as “groundbreaking” (by those breaking out the lawn

Nov
06

BREAKING: The Sultan Wins Big in Slowjamastan Blowout Election…

      …But a Mysterious Write-In Vote for SlowjamaStanley Raises Eyebrows in the Eastern District BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP  l  STAFF WRITER November 6th, 2024   Dublândia: In a landslide victory that absolutely no one saw coming (except maybe The

Oct
29

Your Electronic Ballot: Slowjamastan General Election 2024

      SCROLL DOWN TO VOTE   Voting Instructions for the 2024 Republic of Slowjamastan Election: The Greatest Election Ever! Greetings, esteemed citizens of Slowjamastan! It’s that time again when we get to exercise our most sacred right: the

Oct
28

Sultan Crashes Heber Fall Fiesta, Claims He’s Just There for the Pumpkin Spice Diplomacy

  BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP  l  STAFF WRITER October 27th, 2024   Heber, CA – Last Saturday, residents of Heber were in for a wild ride as The Sultan of Slowjamastan himself rolled into town to join the annual Fall Fiesta

Oct
21

Postal Service Debacle Leaves Passport in Limbo – Sultan to the Rescue!

  BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP  l  STAFF WRITER October 20th, 2024   Algiers – In the quiet hills of Tizi Ouzou, Algerian Mourad Tabti had just one dream: to hold in his hands the holy grail of citizenship—his very own Slowjamastani

Sep
24

Upcoming Slowjamastan Shenanigans: When, Where, and Why You Can’t Miss Out

  The Sultan Returns: Blame NATO and a Parking Ticket, But We’re Back! We know, we know—you’ve been asking, nay, DEMANDING, an event with The Sultan, and we sincerely apologize for the delay! Between rubbing elbows at the NATO Summit

Sep
24

The Sultan Snags ‘Micronation of the Year’ at the Royal Gala

    Proving Once Again That Small Nations Can Dream Big… Especially When There’s Free Champagne Involved! BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP  l  STAFF WRITER September 21st, 2024   Aigues-Mortes, France — In a night that will surely go down in the Official

Aug
04

World Peace on Hold as Sultan Enters Intense Guacamole Challenge

      Guac ‘n’ Roll Gangster: Sultan Defends Avocado Crown BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP  l  STAFF WRITER August 1st, 2024   San Diego — In a highly anticipated return to the United States, The Sultan of Slowjamastan set foot on

Freedom

We believe in freedom for all citizens of Slowjamastan. You want pancakes for dinner? Do it. Fancy a pet aardvark? Do that, too. There’s not much you can’t do in Slowjamastan, however, please refer to our national laws and regulations. 

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Honor

Slowjamastanians are bound by honor. Our word is bond. Valour, chivalry, honesty, and compassion are all important values to us. We do the right thing, follow the golden rule, and don’t use speakerphone in public.

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Respect

We respect the land, the animals, our leader, each other. R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to Slowjamastan. A little respect. (Sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me.) R-E-S-P-E-C-T. A little respect.

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Parliament

Joe Lindsay

Director of Land Management 

Matt Conde

Commander

Slowjamastan Security Forces

OPEN

95 Political appointee 
positions available

SLOWJAMASTAN CITIZENSHIP:

Now, you can have a piece of Slowjamastan for yourself.

We’re currently offering citizenship. Grab a passport in our shop. Even diplomatic and political appointments for qualified applicants are available. 

If you promise never to wear Crocs inside The Republic, listen to mumble rap, or drive in the passing lane while not passing – you’re our kinda citizen. Git’cher butt down here!

More Info